Identifying Conflict
Signs of Abuse

Lesson 1: How to Tell if Someone May be Experiencing Domestic Conflict

Complete & Continue Next Lesson Learn More

IN THIS LESSON

What to watch for in those you care about.

We will look at different signs that may indicate someone is in an abusive relationship. These signs are not exclusive to being in unhealthy or abusive relationships, and seeing these signs in others should be a first step to determining what your next steps are.

Let’s explore signs you may encounter with different types of abuse

  • Signs of physical abuse may include bruises/marks that don't match the story they give you, wearing long sleeves/pants to hide marks, flinching around quick movements, and injuries that don't heal due to repeated injury.

  • Signs of emotional abuse include calling themselves names, saying they can't do certain things, being unsure of their memories/experiences, needing to ask permission before making decisions, and being unable to make their own decisions.

  • Signs of sexual abuse tends to fall in two categories:
    1. Expressed: hyper-sexual, fearful/visibly shaken, dissociation, nightmares, etc;
    2. Controlled: ashamed, feeling helpless, confusion, isolation, etc.

  • Signs of financial abuse includes needing to ask permission before spending money, needing to ask for money to spend on basic needs, and working multiple jobs.

  • Signs of technological abuse can include not having their own phone, not having their own social media accounts, taking long times to respond to messages, and getting continuous messages/calls when they aren't together to ask where they are/who they're with/etc.

  • Signs of criminal harassment (ie. stalking) can include constantly looking behind them, changing routines and having inconsistent schedules, frustration toward receiving messages or hearing repeated notifications, and using public transit when they have a vehicle.

  • Signs of legal abuse include multiple types of court matters at once, when (non-criminal) court matters take multiple months, and concerns of court matters being moved dates because orders by the judge were not fulfilled.

  • Signs of property abuse include always having new/thrifted items replacing previous items, not inviting people to their house with reasons such as ongoing renovations, and saying they have misplaced/lost items.